The Truth About Changing Your Automatic Behaviour

It can be difficult to change our automatic behavior, especially if it’s something we’ve been doing for a long time. For me, I used to automatically stay quiet whenever someone cut in front of me in line at the bakery. I knew it was my turn, but I didn’t want to cause any trouble.
In therapy, I came to understand that this was a pattern for me – I liked being seen as friendly, wise, and sensible. However, just knowing this didn’t automatically make me change my behavior. It still felt difficult and uncomfortable to speak up for me, so I often stayed silent.

If you find yourself in a similar situation, it’s important to remember that you can change your automatic behavior. It may take some time and effort, but it is possible to break old patterns and establish new, healthier ones.

Can Insight Alone Lead to Changing Your Behavior?
If you have the insight, but don’t believe that you can change, then it’s going to be very difficult. However, if you have the insight and also believe that change is possible, then you’re much more likely to be successful.
The first step is to become aware of your patterns of behavior. Once you’re aware of them, you can start to question why you do certain things automatically. For me, I questioned why I felt the need to be seen as nice, wise, and sensible.

I realized that these were beliefs that I had internalized from my family and society. I didn’t need to live up to these beliefs in order to be a good person. I could be kind and assertive at the same time.

Making this realization was an important step in changing my behavior. Once I realized that I didn’t have to behave in a certain way, it became much easier to act differently.
If you want to change your automatic behavior, it’s important to understand that you have the power to do so. Change is possible, but it requires effort and commitment. With time and practice, you can learn to respond in a more conscious and intentional way.

Why Does Insight Not Always Lead to Changing Your Automatic Behavior?
Your automatic behavior is shaped by your patterns of persuasion. In the situation at the bakery, the beliefs “I must be nice,” “I must be the wisest,” and “I must not get angry” were at play for me.

When I started working on myself with energy psychology, I started giving myself permission to be unkind and to get angry. Beliefs like “I’m allowed to be unkind,” “I’m allowed to set my boundaries,” and “I’m allowed to get angry” then became my beliefs.
Now it’s no problem for me to respond assertively at the bakery with “I think it’s my turn.” I do it automatically and feel relaxed about it.

The difference is that my automatic behavior is now in line with my new set of beliefs. So if you want to change your automatic behavior, it’s important to start by changing your patterns of persuasion.
What Are Some Patterns of Persuasion That Can Lead to Changing Your Automatic Behavior?
Some common patterns of persuasion that can lead to changing your automatic behavior include:

“I should/shouldn’t do X”
“I have to/don’t have to do X”
“It’s good/bad if I do X”
These patterns of persuasion usually create feelings of obligation, guilt, or shame. They can make it difficult to act in a way that goes against our automatic behavior.

Changing these patterns of persuasion is an important step in changing our automatic behavior. When we change the way we think about our behavior, it becomes much easier to act differently.

One pattern of persuasion that can be particularly helpful is “I choose to do X.” This pattern creates a sense of empowerment and choice. It can help us feel more confident and capable of changing our behavior.

Programmed in Your Subconscious
In your perception, you control your life through your wishes and desires. But neuroscience reveals something remarkable: you direct your life only 5 percent of the time with your thinking consciousness. 95 percent of the time, your life is controlled by beliefs and habits programmed into your subconscious.
So you can gain insight into your behavior, but you often fail to change your automatic behavior with it. This is because there are so few moments when you really control your life with your thinking consciousness. The rest of the time, your life is controlled by your subconscious.

In order to change your automatic behavior, you need to change the programs in your subconscious. This is not an easy task, but it is possible. With commitment and effort, you can learn to reprogram your subconscious mind.

One way to do this is with energy psychology techniques like tapping (EFT). Tapping can help you release the emotions and beliefs that are keeping your automatic behavior in place. Once these emotions and beliefs are released, it becomes much easier to change your behavior.

Tapping is just one of many techniques that can be used to reprogram your subconscious mind. If you’re committed to changing your automatic behavior, there are many ways to do it.
Reasons for Automatic Repetition Function
There is a good reason for the existence of this automatic repetition function of your subconscious. When you learn to walk as a child, you need all your energy and concentration for this. The same happens when you later learn to drive a car. But once you master these new habits, your subconscious turns them into automatic procedures. Something that seemed almost impossible at one point suddenly becomes dead easy. You don’t even think about it anymore when you put one foot in front of the other or drive the car home.

You don’t just record simple motor movements, such as walking and driving. You also record certain perceptions and behaviors. This recording happens largely in the first 6 years of your life. You adopt behaviors and beliefs from your upstarts as a way to function quickly. This is how your belief patterns are created, which still largely determine your behavior today. Regularly, this is not the behavior you are happy with now as an adult.

Fortunately, you can change these subconscious programs by learning new, more empowering beliefs and behaviors. You do this by regularly repeating the new behavior until it becomes a habit. The old programming is then slowly replaced by the new. You are then no longer automatically controlled by limiting patterns from the past but by conscious choices in the present.

Different Ways of Learning

Your thinking consciousness and your subconscious differ in their ways of learning:
– The thinking consciousness learns through inspiration: reading a book, going to a movie, or having an interesting conversation with a friend or teacher.
– The subconscious automates procedures or forms habits.
If you want to replace automatic procedures or habits in your subconscious, you will have to replace the beliefs that drive your subconscious. This is not an easy task. The thinking consciousness can only reach the subconscious through feelings. You will, therefore, have to arouse certain feelings in yourself to change your subconscious programming.

You can do this by reliving old experiences or by imagining future ones. This way, you create feelings that influence your subconscious and help to change the program. You can also use affirmations and visualizations to create new beliefs in your subconscious. These are powerful tools that can help you change your automatic behavior.

Tapping Into Your Subconscious to Change Automatic Behavior

This is why the insights you gain from a good talk therapy or from a book or workshop often do not immediately result in changing your automatic behavior. It does not change your beliefs. This does not change your automatic behavior and, therefore, your reality. Those insights address the false consciousness. By replacing a belief directly in your subconscious, you can change your behavior immediately.
When you know how your subconscious works, you can use this knowledge to change your automatic behavior. You can use affirmations and visualizations to change your beliefs. This way, you can directly influence your subconscious and change your automatic behavior.
You can also use other techniques, such as reliving old experiences or imagining future ones, to create feelings that influence your subconscious and help to change the program.

When you have changed your beliefs, it becomes easier to change your behavior. Your thoughts and actions are no longer automatically determined by the past but by conscious choices in the present. This gives you a lot more freedom and flexibility in your life. You are no longer a victim of your subconscious programming but the creator of your own life.

Final Thoughts

Automatic behavior is determined by subconscious programming. This programming is often based on old, limiting beliefs that no longer serve you.

So, the next time you find yourself behaving in a way that you don’t want to, remember that you can change it. You have the power to change your subconscious programming. And when you do, you’ll be amazed at how much more freedom and flexibility you have in your life.

A clarity call with me can help you to understand your subconscious programming and give you the tools you need to change it. Schedule a free call with me today to get started.

Don’t wait any longer to start living the life you want. You have the power to change your life, starting now.

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